Romeo and Juilet for Valley Girls
by Ellana
Summary: If valley girls wrote the balcony scene, this is how it would turn out. R&R SVP


THIS SCENE CO-AUTHORED BY AMANDA

**ROMEO AND JULIET_ for Valley Girls_**

_Act 2 Scene 2 ("The Balcony Scene")_

_Enter Romeo_

ROMEO__

Like, he really shouldn't laugh at me!  He has like absolutely     no idea what's going on.

_Enter Juliet above_

Who is that?  Oh!  It's Juliet!  She is so gorgeous!  Like    totally.  Oh my god!  She talks!

JULIET

     Yeah...poor me!  I'm like so totally bummed out.  _Sighs_

ROMEO

     Speak again, my angel.  You're more gorgeous than anything in like the mall, and your voice is so hot

JULIET

     Romeo, oh, like, why do you have to be named Romeo?  That is so    totally uncool. Why don't you, like, change your name or    something, you know?  Or even, like, you can't, but if you, like      still love me, I'll, like, change my name, you know?

ROMEO

     Should I like say something?

JULIET

     It's, like, so silly why you are totally my enemy.  I mean like    it's just a stupid name.  Its not like anything you can touch, or anything.  So if you, like, change it to something else, then      like everything would be ay-okay, right?

ROMEO

     _Singing _Just tell me you love me, and I will totally change my     name.  I won't be Romeo anymore!  Just for you!

JULIET  
     Oh my god!  Like, who's there?

ROMEO

     I cannot tell you my name for you like hate it.

JULIET

     Oh my god, oh my god!  Is that, like, you Romeo?  I mean, aren't   you, like, a Montague?

ROMEO  
     I won't be if you don't like it!

JULIET

     Oh my god!  How did you, like, get in here?  I mean, the walls     are, like, so high.  And my daddy would, like, kill you for sure    if he ever saw you here!

ROMEO

     The love that I totally have for you brought me here!  Oh let him come!  I don't care if I was like faced by a hundred of your   father's shot guns

JULIET

     Like, Hello!  They would like totally blow your brains out, you    do realise that?

ROMEO  
     Your gaze is like more deadly than your father's bullets, man!

JULIET

     But I'd be totally relieved if they, like didn't find you here,    you know?

ROMEO

     It's dark, man!  They will not be able to see me or nothin'!  But like if you don't love me, they should totally kill me for   their hate than for me to die like totally heart broken from      you!

JULIET

     Yeah, but you, like, didn't answer my question, y'know?  So, like, who told you how to get in here?

ROMEO

     Love guided me here, but why does it matter?  I would have    totally gone to like the farthest mall to be with you!

JULIET

     Aww, that is, like, so sweet!  Do you, like, love me?  Just say    so, cause I like totally trust you.  I'm not like coming on too     fast or anything, right?  I mean, like, if that's, like, the     case, we can, like, totally slow down if like, you want to.  But, like, I do, love you even if I don't, you know,    pretend to    be, like, all shy and all that!  You know?

ROMEO

     I swear I love you by the moon above the mall....

JULIET  
     Like, ew!  The moon is like totally unstable.  She's like always   changing shape.  And I don't like want you to be like a player    or anything.

ROMEO

     Then what do you like want me to say?

JULIET

     Then, like, don't say anything!  Or why don't you, I don't know    say you love me by, like, your totally gorgeous self?  

ROMEO

     Okay, if you want me to....

JULIET

     Well, like, never mind.  Don't, like, say anything.  Its, like,    totally out of line, to like, say something like that on a first   date, y'know?  So g'night!  And could you like hit my cell      later?

ROMEO

     Are you seriously going to leave me like this?

JULIET

     Uh...like what?

ROMEO

     Um, without you saying you love me?

JULIET

     Aw!  I like already did, but I'd totally do it again in, like in, a total heartbeat.

ROMEO

     You'd like take it back?  How could you?

JULIET

     So I could, like, say it again, duh.  I am like so totally in love with you, y'know?

NURSE

     Juliet!

JULIET

     Oh my god!  I got to go!  Like, coming! Could you just, like wait a minute?

_She exits_

ROMEO

     Oh my god!  What a night!  This has to be a dream.  Or maybe....

_Re-enter Juliet above_

JULIET

     I, like, so have to go!  If you, like, want to go steady, like,    totally hit my cell!  But like what time can you call?

 NURSE

     Juliet!

JULIET

     Like, coming!  But if you, like, just in it for, like, a one- nighter, like why don't you-

NURSE

     Juliet!

JULIET

     Like, coming!  Whatever!  Why don't you just, like, leave me alone to, like, cry?

ROMEO

     Oh, I'll wait...

JULIET

     So, like, g'night times, like, a thousand!

_She exits_

ROMEO

     And like a thousand times more I wish you were like here.  I go    to you as gladly as I like leave my studies, but I go from you   as gladly as I go to like third period Ceramics!

_Romeo starts to leave_

_Enter Juliet again_

JULIET  
     Psst!  Romeo!  I, like, love you, and all, but we have to keep     this, like, totally on the down low, cause of my daddy!  But, if I could, I would, like so call all my girlfriends, and, like,     tell them, like, everything, like ASAP, you know, like know I really would, Romeo.

ROMEO

     Oh baby!  I just love it when you say my name.

JULIET

     But, like, Romeo?

ROMEO

     Yeah....

JULIET  
     Like, what time are you gonna call?

ROMEO

     Umm...'bout nine.

JULIET

     Totally awesome!  But, like, oh my god, it is so long of a time    'till then.  Oh, I like totally forgot why I told you to stay.

ROMEO  
     I can stay here 'till you remember.  I would stay with you    forever, you're like so gorgeous!

JULIET

     But, then I, like, totally won't remember!  And you like have to   go!  It's, like, almost morning!  So, like, G'night!  Mwah!

_She exits_

ROMEO

     Sweet dreams, my love!  Ay!  gotta dip out, I need some mad   advice from the priest, man!

_He exits_


End file.
